What Most People Get Wrong About the Enneagram
The Enneagram isn’t what most people think it is. Let’s set the record straight.
When you hear “Enneagram,” do you think just another personality test? Maybe even a horoscope? If so, you’re missing something huge.
I get the question a lot: “Is it like astrology?” Nope. It’s also not just a fun party trick or a label to box yourself in.
The Enneagram is not just another personality test. Reducing it to that disregards the vast, deep wisdom it holds about childhood ego development, laws of nature, sacred geometry, and the full spectrum of the human experience.
The Enneagram: A Symbol, Not Just a Test
The Enneagram isn’t just a test—it’s first and foremost a symbol. A pattern found in nature, science, and even business processes. Throughout history, philosophers, mathematicians, psychologists, and spiritual teachers have used it to explain human behavior.
What most people know as “the Enneagram” is actually The Enneagram of Personality—a psychological model of nine ego structures developed by Oscar Ichazo and expanded by Claudio Naranjo.
This distinction matters. Because when we treat the Enneagram as nothing more than a personality test, we completely miss the depth and transformative power it holds.
How the Science of the Enneagram Explains Personality Development
Many people try to place the Enneagram in the “woo” category. But as a nurse and psychology major, I’m passionate about showing you the science behind it.
The Enneagram symbol beautifully illustrates theories of psychological childhood ego development and the neuroscience of personality formation.
Now, let’s talk about why your Enneagram type formed in the first place—through both psychology and neuroscience.
How We Lose Connection to Our Full Self
Look at the Enneagram symbol. Imagine that the entire symbol represents your whole, authentic self—the full, fluid, interconnected human experience you were born with.
When you came into this world, you had access to all nine points. Don’t believe me? Look at young children. Young children…
Are able to say “NO – I DON’T LIKE THAT.” (the energy of Enneagram 8)
Sit around a circle and sing harmoniously together (the energy of Enneagram 9)
Get fixated on certain routines and rules (the energy of Enneagram 1)
Find pride in “Mommy’s little helper” (the energy of Enneagram 2)
Unabashedly perform dance routines for their family (the energy of Enneagram 3)
Cry and share their pain when their feelings are hurt (the energy of Enneagram 4)
Remove themselves from the group when they need privacy (the energy of Enneagram 5)
Tell you when they are scared (the energy of Enneagram 6)
Engage in magical, imaginative play and thinking (the energy of Enneagram 7)
A child does all of these things!
But something happens as we grow up.
Dr. Gabor Maté, one of my favorite trauma-informed thought leaders, teaches in The Myth of Normal that humans have two core needs:
To remain connected to our authentic self
To be attached to our caregivers
We need both to thrive. But in early childhood, when we face the choice between authenticity and attachment, we must sacrifice authenticity in order to survive, to create attachment.
We receive messages—spoken or unspoken—that certain behaviors create separation from our caregivers, making it harder to get our needs met.
So, we one by one, we prune away access behaviors (associated with Enneagram Types) that don’t lead to attachment and double down on the ones that do.
And just like that, we start losing connection to our full self.
The Neuroscience of Personality Formation
Now, let’s talk about what’s happening in the brain.
You may have heard of epigenetics—the study of how our environment influences which genes are turned on or off. We now know that personality develops in a similar way.
We are all born with access to the full range of genes associated with many human behaviors—the energy of all nine Enneagram types. But our brains, wired for efficiency, start to prune away neural pathways toward behavior genes that don’t get our needs met and sprout new pathways to the ones that do.
Over time, one by one, we lose access to the other eight points on the Enneagram map.
And voilà—by about age 4 or 6, our personality (our Enneagram type) is solidified.
From there, we spend the rest of childhood and early adulthood reinforcing that identity—until it becomes more and more rigid.
The Good News: Neuroplasticity & Transformation
But here’s the good news: we are not stuck.
Thanks to neuroplasticity, we can rewire our brains and reclaim the parts of ourselves we lost.
Because: we sprout new neural pathways by learning.
By learning about our Enneagram type’s default behaviors and mindsets, we bring what’s in our unconscious into conscious awareness.
By asking: “There are nine ways to achieve safety, esteem, and control—what messages did I receive that told me my way was the only way?” we start to break free from the limitations of our ego.
And by practicing new behaviors and mindsets—moving around the Enneagram map—we can reconnect with the full, authentic self we once had access to.
Breaking Free from the Ego’s Grip
Now, let me be clear: this isn’t easy.
The ego is a fierce protector. It truly believes it’s keeping you safe. So when you start challenging it, it clings on tight. Sometimes, it won’t even let you speak of other ways of being.
But here’s the key thing to remember:
The purpose of the Enneagram is not to reinforce your type—it’s to help you disidentify from it.
The whole point is to move beyond your type so you can live a more conscious, abundant life rooted in love, purpose, joy, depth, presence, confidence, compassion, and freedom.
How the Enneagram Can Transform Your Life
This is how the Enneagram can help you heal every area of your life.
By doing deep Enneagram work, you can finally quit the self-sabotaging patterns that keep you stuck. You can break free from the unconscious programming that has been running your life. You can step into your highest potential.
I’ve seen it firsthand. My clients have:
Come off medications for diabetes and other chronic diseases
Decreased anxiety and ADHD symptoms
Improved their lab work and physical health
Strengthened their relationships
Found love and gotten married at 63
Paid off debt and built financial stability
Left jobs that drained them and launched new businesses
Had profound, life-changing spiritual experiences
…all because they stopped operating from the small, isolated place of ego and reconnected to the wholeness of their authentic self.
When you break free from the limitations of your Enneagram type, you unlock your greatest potential.
Are you ready?
Join my 10-Week From Ego to Essence Coaching Program to reconnect your authentic self and experience lasting transformation.
